The Good, the Bad & Ugly of Nintendo



The Good:

Bubble Bobble

Is there anything more infectious than playing a round of Bubble Bobble with your game-loving niece?  Not in this man’s opinion.  She recently came by for the holidays and suggested we play a few rounds (we were both quite good) and it’s just a fun game, but I think is highly benefitted from a dual player experience.  Once you get the hang of the game, you start to understand it even though it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense.  Even so, it’s engaging, uniquely fun and not a super frustrating game at all.  Play with a friend!



Romance of the Three Kingdoms

This is a history game about the Han dynasty in Ancient China.  A history game always sounds exciting, no?   Well, I’ll be Kermit the Frog, it sure is!   This series of games is a hugely successful turn-based strategy game where relying on the computer’s random generator of events and your own lengthy list of options and decisions over what your province should do in the grand scheme of things is pure dynamite.  The thing about Romance is even this original version can keep you going for hours, as you’re General’s province could expanded to overtake the whole region, or you could try any number of the 8 diff. scenarios this game provides.  And this is the first one- try the Sega Genesis version ( the one we played growing up) it’s even more in depth and engrossing.


Fire & Ice

You see that warning label on the cover?   It’s accurate!  A kid between 7-10 will lose days playing NES in those times.   I can’t believe how sucked in I am by these old puzzle games!  I had never even heard of this one but it’s really quite interesting. You are stuck in these closed rooms with blocks of ice.  You can only move them, or make more.  You have to put out the fires in the room to move onto the next puzzle.  Simple right?  I bet the guy who came up with this thought he was going to strike it rich like the guy who invented Post-It notes.  Simple Ideas that should be hits.  I wish I would have known about this cartridge as a kid. I would have at least rented it.  There’s a couple bucks in your pocket, guy.




The Bad:

Bart v. The Space Mutants


This game used to frustrate the hell out of me as a kid because it’s so cryptic and impossible to figure out in your first few attempts and being a big Simpsons fan, I wanted to be good at it.   You start out having to rid Springfield of all purple objects and detecting aliens using your Something-D glasses.  But, there are so many random purple things that aren’t readily obvious, the game can get quite tedious.  I won’t say it’s awful; but a little too involved for my liking, even considering you take 2 hits and you’re done.  This was the ultimate trial & error game of my early youth.



First off, great music, horrible graphics.  And why can’t Wolverine use his claws without hurting himself?   You can just run through the levels if you want to and avoid all the enemies who drain your life the longer you even touch them for a brief moment, or you can duke it out with them.  But with painful claws, it really takes the bite out of this game.




The Ugly:

Dirty Harry: The War on Drugs

“Go Ahead, Punk.  Make….My…Day.    Buy this and feel stupider.  That would make my day.   Haha…stupid consumer.”

Whoever designed this game was already on drugs and had lost the war.  The title screen is a pixelated shot of a grizzled face; I’m surprised it even looked human.  But when you get to the game itself, you’re a turd wearing an ink blot; you don’t look like anything!  Okay, so you can shoot diagonally, big innovation and about as far as the game designers ventured from their Thai plates at lunch time.   This game is shit compared to bad games.  You thought Bill & Ted was bad?  At least I could tell they were actual people.  This is a blimey disgrace.




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